Abandonment is such a tender issue for trauma survivors. Most survivors with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID/MPD) and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) have had more than their fair share of genuine abandonment instances. For severe trauma survivors, abandonment would have been experienced over and over in various situations: Each time your parents or caregivers turned a blind eye to the sexual abuse … [Read more...]
Do’s and Don’ts for Singleton Friends of Multiples
I am not sure who wrote the following list of “Do’s and Don’ts for Singleton Friends of Multiples”. This list was e-mailed to me years ago by a person with Dissociative Identity Disorder, saying this list was comprised by an anonymous group* of multiples. I am sure that there could be many other suggestions added to the list, but for today, I will post it in exactly the same format as I received it. For … [Read more...]
Understanding Child Parts in the Dissociative System
Child parts come in all shapes and sizes - small, tall, skinny, short, chunky, pristine, messy, filthy, princess-like, raggedy, male, female, quiet, noisy, screaming, crying, silent, confused, dazed, sleepy, busy, playful, happy, sad, angry, fearful, bouncing, babyish, stiff, awkward, hurting, numb. As different as they are, they all have similar qualities. They are typically some of the oldest, most knowledgeable … [Read more...]
Overcoming Instability Issues and Unsuccessful Memory Work
Kerro commented: I have a question about stability. I accept that I need to be reliable, motivated, responsible and willing to delve into things I generally don't want to delve into. As for stability - I can see how a stable client is easier to work with for a therapist. However, what if the beginning stages of therapy have resurfaced old issues or retraumatised the client to the extent that … [Read more...]
10 Qualities a Therapist Recognizes in a Good Client, part 1
Most clients quickly think of the many qualities they want in their therapists. However, are those clients also thinking about whether or not they are presenting themselves as the type of client someone would want to work with? As an experienced psychotherapist, I am proposing that there are many criteria for clients to consider about themselves as well as about their prospective therapists. Many of the … [Read more...]