Has there been Light in your Year?

 

As we’re sitting here, near the half way point of this year, near the weeks of the longest sunlight days, the extra length of light brings up the question — How much light is in your life?

Light can appear in a variety of ways.   As much darkness that happens out there in the world, light can be a true comfort.  Light can feel safer, light can feel inspiring, light can feel encouraging.

As hard as any year can be, this past year has also been full of many light-filled moments.  For me, and for you too.

I’m aware, that the summer solstice weekend can be pretty difficult times, certainly more traumatic than other regular weekends.  A weekend of trauma for too many dissociative survivors — creating such a stark contrast to the meaning of light and the goodness that LIGHT represents.

At the same time, this year, at this bright time of the year, I want to focus on some lighter moments.  Let’s bring some brighter, lighter times to mind as well.  I hope to encourage you to find ways to bring more LIGHT into your life, especially as you interact with your dissociative system folks.  Your light-filled leadership of your insiders matters greatly during your healing process.

I’ll highlight a few of the good moments when LIGHT shone on me, and while I do, I encourage you to consider what light you’ve experienced this year as well.

 

Hilo Bay Sunrise

 

Sunrise, wherever you are, brings a beautiful expansive, growing LIGHT at the beginning of a new day.

Wherever you are in the world, you can experience a new dawning of light, each morning.  You have the opportunity to spend a little time recognizing the beauty of that new day, welcoming it’s new adventures, new discoveries, new moments. 

What will you do with your new day?  Do you ask your insiders what they want to accomplish that day?  Do you check in with them, at least for a few minutes, to see how they feel?  To hear their heart?  To share a moment?  To even say good morning?

Each sunrise, each morning, gives you another day to help your people get a little more healing.  How will you make this day make a difference?  Who will you give more of your day’s time to?  How will you help those little ones have a better day than they used to have?

Each morning, with each day, full of light, be mindful of what you can do to help your system.  You have inside people who need your time, your attention, your compassion, your understanding, your guidance. 

How will you share the light of day with them today?

 

Kīlauea Iki Trail

On the big island in Hawaii, in Hawai‘i Volcanoes National Park, you can do an incredible hike across the solidified lava lake floor of the Kīlauea Iki crater.  Out in the middle of the crater, you are in a world of sun, in a wide open space, not a single shadow around.  LIGHT is everywhere.

This light-filled space is so very quiet and peaceful at this point in time.  However, while standing in the middle of a massive yet extinct volcano, your mind wanders back to what this exact land once powerfully displayed.  Once an erupting enormous explosion of lava, giant fiery extensions of glowing bright red and yellow lava bombs, creating colossal bursts of energy that were permanently island-changing, life-changing.  The explosion light of hot lava would have been awe-inspiring, but frightening, intense, and even dangerous.  This area now sits, a quiet, calm, peaceful strip of sun-baked, hardened-still lava.  You are invited to share in the light of the sun without all the outbursts and blowups that active volcanoes create. 

This massive 2-4+ mile hike is a challenge for sure.  Would you challenge your system to walk down the rim of a volcano, cross its solid top, and climb back up the steep sides?  Would you circle the rim of the volcano only?  Would you dare to cross the entire crater, or go half-way then return?  How adventurous are you and your crew? 

This challenge is a good metaphor for how far and how hard you will work to reach the needs of your system.  There are moments when a hike of this size is thoroughly exhausting.  The bright searing sun is hot, and hopefully, you brought enough water, sunscreen, snacks and solid shoes. There are no convenience stores out here!

Instead, there are countless cracks and fractures dropping down in the ground, and sharp cutting edges of lava poking up.  It’s an adventure walk, for sure, and one that requires attention to detail and solid preparation  It’s not easy.  There are a zillion places to trip and fall.

Isn’t your healing journey like this?

After the explosions and lava bombs of trauma, and years of abuse, all the hardened areas of your life still need time, attention, exploration, examination. 

Do you have the strength and courage it takes to walk deeply into the areas of stress, strain, separation and pain? 

Do you have the willingness to see the deep crevices in your dissociative system  and the most difficult gaps hidden within your trauma history?

You will find times when the healing process is exactly this exhausting.  When you feel totally isolated and alone from your other insiders.  When finding that one lost child feels far too big of a task.  When digging up that excruciating memory feels too intense.

When the bright light of day shows so much of the pain you were trying to forget. 

When the hardened soil feels too inpenetrable.  Too sharp.  Too dangerous.  Too much. 

When the healing journey is intensely difficult, do you continue onwards?

Or do you quit early?

 

Kīlauea Iki Crater

Wow! 

When you do finally climb up the side of that deep volcanic valley, you can see the path you were on.  Look what you accomplished!  Look at how far you’ve come!  Do you see?  Do you see where you were, compared to where you are now?

Can you begin to feel proud of your healing journey?

Can you feel and acknowledge that you are making progress? 

Even when the whole picture is still not visible, can you appreciate the gains you’ve made?  Even when there is more to do, can you give yourself credit for trudging through as much as you’ve done?

Working through a lifetime of trauma issues, with the layers of your dissociative system, it’s a long journey, for sure.  You’ll find those parched areas of dry lava fields, even in your world.  Maybe even in your internal landscape.  And yet…  Yet, your insiders need you.  You need them.  And the relief will come.  It won’t always be this hard.

Reconnecting with what was traumatically torn apart will be one of the most rewarding things you can do for your heart and soul.  And yet…. Your deepest healing and your upmost safety and your fullest freedom all depend on you having the strength to walk through even the most parched and sharp of areas, no matter how large that lava field may be.

The LIGHT of day can help you see what has been unmanageable.  You’ll be able to find the insiders who were hidden in the dark, lost and abandoned by their terror and pain.  You’ll be able to find them, reach them, help them, rescue them, and provide a new life for them.  You can accomplish more than you knew you could.  I encourage you — go turn that light on, and go look for your people.  You’ll find them.  And they are beautiful.

The healing journey is intense, no doubt, but every single one of your insiders is worth it.  Every. Single. One. of. Them.

 

Ocean Edges – Hilo Bay

 

Good news!  Despite all the hard times, eventually, many days of the healing process can feel like swimming and wading in the bright teal blue ocean waters. 

The jagged rocks of pain and trauma may still be scattered around, but sitting peacefully with the relief of the calm, cool waters can be there too.  Comfort, reassurance, connection brings healing back to a system of people who were once exploded apart. 

Group your insiders together, in safe places where you can openly see each other.  Connect together where the light of day creates a beautiful place to gather.  Separation and isolation may feel “normal” to you, and learning to reconnect to your people will take some practice, and yet… there is a deep, soothing, filling feeling to being reconnected. 

Can you imagine your insiders finding healing in the teal blue waters, sheltered from storms, refreshed from the heat, enjoying bright, warm sunlight instead of deep, dark trauma? 

If more of your people were feeling comforted and safe, instead of terrified and forgotten, how would that change your day?  How would that change your mood?

 

Jedidiah Jao Chai 

Yep, it’s true.  An intruder arrived! 

Another kitten has found his way to my home.  Suddenly, unexpectedly. Loudly!  With much panic and wailing.

You might wonder, how is this possible??   

Don’t you already have enough kittens, Kathy??!!  

And of course, I do already have enough kittens, for sure, that is true!  I wasn’t looking for more kittens, but this little guy went out of his way to make a big scene, just to get invited in. 

He is tiny and beautiful and was definitely looking for a home. 

I’ll tell you more of his story later, but for now, rest assured, little bitty Jedidiah is definitely bringing LIGHT into my life this year.   

The quickly-mentioned moral of Jedidiah’s story is that sometimes, some little tiny one can reach out to you, unannounced, totally invited, and yet despite their sudden intrusion into your life, their very appearance can bring a smile to your heart on even those difficult days. 

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Aren’t these places amazing?!

I have more to share.  I have more to say about bringing LIGHT in our lives.

I’ll continue on with additional pictures and stories in my next article.  Stay tuned.  🙂 

Many more light-filled adventures ahead! 

 

And for now, as always, I wish you the best in your light-filled healing journey.  

Warmly,

Kathy

 

 

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