Dissociative Identity Disorder — Real or Not Real?
Well, I have an obvious opinion about that question.
What about you? What do you think?
And if you are a firm believer that DID is a real experience, a real way of managing life…
how do you handle it when someone disagrees with you?
What would you say to a psychiatrist who doesn’t believe DID is real?
- 1980: Multiple Personality Disorder became an official diagnosis in the DSM-III.
- 1994: Multiple Personality Disorder was renamed to Dissociative Identity Disorder in the DSM-IV.
- 2013: DID continues to be recognized in the current edition of the DSM, the DSM-5, and the DSM-5-TR
I’m not here to give you a history lesson, but to make a point.
Dissociative Identity Disorder is real.
Dissociative Identity Disorder is real, and to anyone who has spent any time with those who experience life as dissociative systems, it can be seen as clear as the nose on your face. I have every reason to believe that a dissociative system is created by trauma, excessive trauma, and the very ability to dissociate created a way of escape for a person who could not escape the horrors they were experiencing. It’s pretty amazing really. The mind is an incredible thing. A powerful thing.
- Have you witnessed someone switching from one self to another self? I sure have.
- Have you spent time with a young child part, who is completely different from the adult professional self? I sure have.
- Have you watched someone have complete confusion, upset and distress when they realized they were missing time / experiencing amnesia and they really didn’t remember something that was important to know? I sure have.
- Have you watch someone be visibly very different selves, with different names, different presentations, different preferences, different beliefs, even different looks, different voices — all coming from the same outside body? I sure have.
- Have you spent time with anyone who was drenched in pain, hurting, and having a flashback about something that happened years ago? I sure have.
- Have you watched someone have conversations within themselves, maybe verbally, maybe in their mind, but have you seen them really talking with themselves, and hearing other’s responses? I sure have.
- Have you heard horror stories of trauma and abuse, enough to give a person more than ample reasons to split, switch, and leave the scene, if not in their body, then at least in their mind? I sure have.
No, I’m not dissociative. No, I’m not a system, but I’ve been immersed with the dissociative population since 1988. That’s a long, long time to be around. That makes me one of the OG’s, and almost as old as the dinosaurs, lol. I started in the 80’s way back when the diagnosis was first recognized. And my version of lived experience is still decades of experience definitely lived! And there’s no doubt in my mind that DID is real. In fact, I probably believe this more than some of you, lol.
Okay, so that’s a joke to the dissociative survivors who are forever saying it’s not real, when it is most certainly real! How many times does the dissociative population deny their own DID? Y’all may deny your own insiders, but I see them! I talk to them. I remember them. So you know… y’all deny your DID more than I ever will, that is for sure!
What do you do when someone says DID is not real?
Despite 45 years of official diagnostic recognition, and thousands upon thousands of recognized lives being lived as dissociative systems, there are still mental health professionals out there who still say DID is not real. That’s a bit wonky, if you ask me. A little hard to fathom, but yep. This is still the case. Have you ever run into a Mental Health Professional (MHP) who says DID is not real? How do you handle that dilemma?
Let me tell you about a time when I had to defend that DID is REAL.
Okay… go back a few years of time. Covid-19, world pandemic years.
Did you know that the FIRST question I had to address in the HCC situation?
Is DID real? Our concern is that DID is NOT real.
“Is DID real? It might not be real. In fact, some say it isn’t real. We’re listening to a psychiatrist who says DID is NOT real. And if DID isn’t real….”
Yep! That was the first situation to address. IS DID REAL?
And guess how that question impacted the rest of the story?
PLEASE NOTE. I’m PARAPHRASING here, to get the point across. “The starting belief is that DID isn’t real. DID does not exist. There are no legitimate claims of DID. And since there is no such thing as DID, then there are no “dissociative trauma survivors.” And if there are no such people as “dissociative trauma survivors”, then there is no need such information. And since there is no public need to recognize DID, there is no need for a website that talks about dissociation. And since there is no such thing as Dissociative Identity Disorder, then there is no need to offer a website, or to offer services, or to offer any help to a non-existent population.
And since DID isn’t real, and DID doesn’t exist, then NO ONE should be able to see this website about Dissociative Identity Disorder. You shouldn’t even have this website because DID is not a real thing.
And if you are pretending DID is a real thing when it is not, then you are surely tricking a whole world of people, and offering paid services to a population that doesn’t even exist. We don’t know what problems those people may have, but they surely cannot have DID because that is not a real condition. You are obviously tricking them to believe they are DID. Because DID is not real.
And offering a website with a paid service to a non-existent population of people means you are exploiting and tricking people who don’t exist because they don’t actually have this thing called Dissociative Identity Disorder. Because that doesn’t exist. So you can’t be saying you provide services for DID when that does not exist. And offering services for a non-existent condition makes you dangerous. You are exploiting people because this condition does not exist.
You are a danger because you believe DID is real when it is not.”
~~~~
Wow.
Kinda wild, hey?
I must admit, I didn’t see that accusation coming in 2021!
Surely you can hear a little bit of sarcasm in my paraphrased words, but the very serious concern and accusation presented to me was exactly that: the belief that DID was not real, and no one anywhere should be offered services for a condition that does not exist.
My FIRST line of response was to prove that DID is real.
Isn’t that bizarre? We’re talking 2021. A mere 41-years after DID was officially recognized in the DSM — The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. We’re using version DSM-5-TR now, but still, Dissociative Identity Disorder remains listed under the code 300.14.
Now. I bet you didn’t know that the first step was me fighting for YOU!
I bet you didn’t realize that the beginning was teaching that DID is real.
I bet you didn’t understand that the first thing I did was to stand up to some tough minded legal administrators and say that YES! DID is part of the DSM-V and ICD-10. It does exist.
I bet you didn’t realize that I educated these legal administrators by sending in a dozen or more research articles, and speaking about their very own Dr Warwick Middleton, a well known leader in dissociative disorders who has a dissociative unit / hospital in the Brisbane Australia suburbs.
I went on to describe some of my own observations and experiences with the dissociative population. I explained how I could see the very concepts described in the DSM. And of course, I argued that support and services were needed, and valid, and frankly, good services were hard to find.
In some ways, despite the original aggressive starting point, it was pretty easy to prove DID is a real thing, especially considering I’m not the person who created the DSM, but you know… “DID is not real” was the original accusation.
OF COURSE I argued that DID IS REAL and that dissociative trauma survivors ARE REAL.
Years later, it’s mind-boggling to me that the first question was all about acknowledging that you are real, that you exist, that you are dissociative, and that you’ve gone through such atrocities that would create a thing such as DID.
My word, as a lowly foreigner, a no-name American social worker was paired up against a fancy well-respected Australian psychiatrist. A lopsided status battle, that’s for sure. I was most definitely the underdog. But you know what? Truth was on my side. DID is real! DID does exist! Dissociative trauma survivors are real people, and dissociative folks are allowed to have services and support too.
So maybe next time you wonder, you might understand more if you remember my history, and my reality.
I’m not dangerous to you.
I battled for you.
I stood up for you.
I was on your side.
I demonstrated the truth of your dissociative experiences.
I explained the sad truth that enough horrific trauma happens out there in the world that a condition called “Dissociative Identity Disorder” exists.
I showed HCC that Dissociative Identity Disorder is very much a real thing. I wasn’t too scared or too ashamed to advocate for the dissociative population.
And yes, while I was being accused of being a risk to society for advocating for this “fake thing called DID”, I was being your spokes-person about the reality of DID.
And HCC heard me. They fully removed and dismissed their concerns about this site being dangerous or a risk to public. I had clearly proved to them that DID is a real diagnoses, a genuine condition that thousands of trauma survivors around the world manage on a daily basis.
I hope you noticed that, because they dropped that line of questioning pretty quickly. I just had to speak up, and spread a little bit of DID awareness and education!
Speaking of opportunities for dissociative survivors…
Our annual P4 DID Retreat is only a few months away.
October 5-15, 2025.
We’re meeting in Texas again this year.
If you want to spend a few days, or even all 10-days learning about DID from a group of other dissociative trauma survivors, and of course, with me, Kathy the OG, then contact me soon to discuss how this could be an option for you.
It will be good to meet you, and to share some healing time together. Our retreats are so incredibly fun and helpful. We do good things and have excellent conversations. We use art, skits, play time, meal time, dancing, friendship, discussions and more to enjoy time with a big variety of your system folks. You wanna learn something about your system? Or learn new skills? Be brave and join us.
In the meantime, I guess the moral of the story is to know there is always more to someone’s story. Dissociative survivors are not the only people with complicated life stories!
Also for dissociative survivors, I want you to know that I’ve been on your side from the beginning of my years with you. My 30-40 years with you hasn’t been for nothing. I am the real deal. And even though it’s been hard and stressful at times, I have believed in you, and stood by you all these years. You don’t have to believe in me in return, but I’m still standing firm in saying DID is real and you should have all the best options for healing.
Take gentle care AND…. May you also be brave in being willing to stand up for the reality that DID exists. Stand up for your insiders, and truly listen to them. They are real. They are there, for a reason. They haven’t left, for a reason.
It’s hard to find people who truly understand DID, but here at Discussing Dissociation, and this community here? We get it.
For now, I wish you the very best in your healing journey — and again, stay forever thankful for your place of peace.
Warmly,
Kathy
Copyright © 2008-2026 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
I can hardly believe it, but it has been over ten years since I have been here. I think I forgot. I am glad to see you are still writing. I had a rough few years where I convinced myself that I never had DID, that DID was not real, that the RA/MC material that had tormented me for so long was false. Now I accept that it was part of my past, regardless of its origin. I was diagnosed long ago in the 90s. I do not think I meet criteria anymore, and have been functional for many years. Something has drawn me back here. I find comfort in reading your posts and the comments. I even saw some comments I left long ago. That was a strange feeling! It is great to see the evolution of this site and to read about the retreats and the forums. I wish that had been available back when I was struggling to heal. This is a wonderful resource!
HI WintersKeeper!
WOW — yes, hello, hello! I absolutely remember you, and it is so very good to hear from you again. Thank you for dropping a quick note — I’m glad to hear you’re doing well. I appreciate the vote of confidence, an encouraging word to others that healing really is possible, “doing better” really can happen, and being functional is an absolute reality for dissociative folks who genuinely and truly work with their system. I believe that too — the pain doesn’t have to stay as intense for folks as it may feel right now. Life really can get better, but it may take some hard work.
Yep, I’m still writing — maybe not as often as in the early years, but I’m definitely still writing. Next month is the 17th anniversary of Discussing Dissociation, and things have evolved a lot through the years, for sure. The forums, retreats, etc have all grown out of hearing what folks want and need to connect and join in safely with other dissociative survivors who are also walking that healing path. The community connection / peer support aspect of this site has developed into something truly amazing to see. I love the growth!
And it’s good for the folks who have effectively walked this journey to provide encouragement for the newcomers. Thanks for your vote of confidence!
Take gentle care, and by all means, stay in touch. You’re welcome here. 🙂
Kathy
Thanks for being so welcoming, Kathy, it means a lot!
I think the forums and retreats you have created are so valuable. I had peers that I met along my journey, but the only way I met them was from inpatient and outpatient hospitalizations at specialized trauma disorders programs. I was very fortunate to have access to that type of treatment setting, but if there had been other options in the form of retreats and online forums, I may have ended up hospitalized far less often. The peers I made relationships with over the years were so crucial to my healing journey.
I totally agree, WintersKeeper. I think the genuine peer-support piece of the retreats and the forums are what makes these resources so incredibly valuable. All too many dissociative people feel so alone and “odd balls” in their local towns and neighborhoods. To be a welcomed part of a friendly supportive community that understands dissociative life, with people who struggle in the same way, or celebrates in similar ways, and do all the switching in between, lol… well, it’s worth a ton just finding that kind of community and fitting in. Such a relief. And sharing time with other good people brings out the best in us, right? I think one of the main points is stepping further away from people who are mean or chaotic, and stepping closer towards people who are invested in healing, and positive support. It’s a surprise sometimes to know that some good people are out there, but they really are. Bet you’re one of them. 🙂
I really hate that those of us with DID have to spend our lives, which have already been filled with so much hell wondering if we are lying. Most people around me don’t know about our DID so we have to pretend to be a singlet. It’s really disheartening, honestly. Because we only have so much energy and though we’d like to have the energy and patience to teach other people about DID, we’re, in many ways, too scared to even start that conversation. We now have a therapist who believes us, and even knows some of the others through writing. But so much of our lives, we have been told that we’re lying that we can’t even open the door to having that conversation. It takes a lot of energy to pretend not to have DID when we do, but the question has always been is it more energy to teach or to pretend? I don’t have an answer. Thank you for believing us, those who have been taught for our whole lives that no matter what we do or say we’re making it all up.
You’re very welcome, D and the bands. I absolutely know without a shadow of a doubt that DID is real. It takes a lot to have the courage to see all the layers of a dissociative life, and takes time to know and hear their life-stories, but splitting into separate selves really can and does happen. There are lots of us out here in the world who know that DID is legit. You are certainly not alone in that reality. Pop in here any time you need to read some words or see some art that reminds you being dissociative exists! Your insiders are there to be helpful for you — it’s good that you are starting to write to them. Keep up the good work.
I was diagnosed way back in the early 90’s. Although I knew that I had a system, I didn’t understand what that meant for me, for us, for us all until I began to read your blog. Your blog is gold compared to the other kinds of information out there. We feel understood when we read about how to connect with our people and why certain kinds of people do what they do. Even your Saddest Little Bear teaches our insiders how to approach other wounded insiders in a very gentle and kind manner.
Kathy, thank you for your dedication to dissociative trauma survivors. It sounds like it has cost you a lot personally to do so. I am so very grateful for your sacrifice. Survivors have to sacrifice so much to find healing and it is sad that mental health providers also have to sacrifice to help us.
Evil people want to keep the effects of their evil actions a secret. I think that is why they fight so hard against the diagnosis. Of course, that is just my opinion. Take it or leave it.
Thank you, Mari. I’m glad you’ve found this resource to be helpful, and yes… sometimes, things worth doing, do come at a cost.
I agree that the creeps shouldn’t win. It’s just wrong what they do, it’s hideous how much ugly is in the world and hurts people who shouldn’t be hurt. I can’t stand that. It’s so very wrong! So… I guess, having a soapbox sometimes means stepping up, even if it comes at a cost.
Thanks for reading and for participating. I appreciate hearing your thoughts. Putting them out here for the world to see does make a difference.
I wish you the very best in your healing journey.
Thank you Kathy!!!! You are amazing and wonderful 💖
When our main outside person (we’ll just call her “R”) was in college in the later half of the 1980s, she had a therapist (LCSW) at the student “health and performance center” who diagnosed her with “severe depression and anxiety” and said she had “ego states” when different ones of us talked to her in therapy. (Many years later, in the early 2000s, after we were diagnosed with MPD, R talked on the phone with this therapist again and told her about the MPD diagnosis. The therapist said that she had known that we had MPD all along, but that it wasn’t an “accepted diagnosis” by the student health center nor the student health insurance, so she couldn’t tell us that it was what we were dealing with nor help us more than the little bit that she was “allowed” to. We only had her as a therapist for about 5 months, when she left the student health center to have her baby and became a full time mom.
After that, R was “assigned” to another therapist, this time a psychologist. The first time one of us others tried to talk to her in therapy, she got really mad and told us: “STOP IT! YOU DO NOT HAVE MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES!! IF YOU HAD MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES YOU WOULDN’T BE FUNCTIONAL ENOUGH TO BE IN A UNIVERSITY! YOU WOULD BE LOCKED UP IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL! SO STOP TRYING TO PRETEND TO HAVE SOMETHING YOU DONT HAVE!” It shocked and upset us all ! R ran out of there crying and we never went back.
Somehow, she made it through a bachelor’s degree at college and got a job as an RN, with good health insurance. It was scary for her to trust going to a therapist again, but we are all glad she finally did. The first therapist she went to after she got the insurance coverage listened to her describe her symptoms and experiences of losing time and poor memory and stuff and got out some papers with lots of questions on them for R to take home to answer and bring back to the office. The next time we saw her, she said her colleague was a specialist who she felt would be really good to help R, and asked permission for the other lady therapist to come in. They both told R that they believed she had MPD. R was scared and didn’t believe them at first and told them what the psychologist at the college had said. But they explained to her about MPD, and that lots of people who have it function very well, hold jobs, and have professional positions in society. They told her that some people with MPD do end up in a mental hospital for a while, just to get stabilized on medications when needed for other conditions that sometimes go along with MPD, like depression and anxiety, but not always, and not just because they are multiples. That was such a relief!
And that was the beginning of our healing journey. We have come a long way since then, mostly due to help from truly caring professionals such as you, Kathy.
So, thank you again for standing up for people like us!!! Our world, and our lives, are better because YOU are in it!!
I wish it wasn’t real. I’m fairly newly diagnosed, and it made things I had experienced in life make a little more sense. I have a therapist who believes, tries and learns. But I don’t know how to tell if I am getting any better. This is real and it produces agonizing experiences. I feel like I have so far to go to even feel remotely normal. Every day I feel afraid that I might do something in public or with friends that do not know about my DID. It’s hard to live with that fear. I spend a lot of time attributing it to forgetfulness or my ADHD. It works but it doesn’t make me feel very good. If others knew, I feel like I would lose my job and some friends. Thanks for your words of encouragement. I just don’t have the courage that I need right now.
After spending 16 years in a relationship with someone who suffered from severe DID, I have earned the right to say the following: any professional who makes the claim that DID is not real, needs a new vocation.
Hey A, I had to giggle at your comment. 🙂
It really is soooooo easy to see what DID looks like, and all the switching, and all the complications involved, especially when you can recognize what you’re seeing. I certainly don’t have experience with all the mental health diagnoses or disorders, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist! Even professionals need to keep learning — they don’t teach us enough about DID in school, so… the learning has to continue afterwards.
Thank you for having the willingness to stick with your loved one for so many years. That’s awesome to hear. I’m sure you could write a book yourself about all you’ve seen. Take gentle care, and I wish you and your partner the very best.
Thank you for all you do, Kathy! If it were not for you and this website, I could not have learned the information necessary to help my husband and his system seek the care they need to work towards acceptance and healing. You are amazing for continuing your journey of love for those with DID.
Hey DID Wife! Oh gosh… it’s a busy big, big job to be a DID Wife! More than people might realize, and thank you for your comment. Thank you for your willingness to learn and join in on this whole journey with folks. I’m really glad this resource has been helpful for you, and I wish you and your husband the very best. It’s a lifelong journey… may you find peace in the storms and enjoy the ride. 🙂
Thank you for this great article.
I wish DID wasn’t real. I’d prefer it wasn’t real and that I didn’t have it. But I do. And I had been diagnosed many, many years before I ever heard of you.
I had been to all sorts of therapy and treatment. Years, in fact. And was getting worse.
Honestly, we made more progress in one month with you than we had in a decade of seeing other people.
I have never seen anyone fight as fiercely and with as much love toward a population of people as I have seen in you.
Thank you for persevering through all the naysayers and haters. People can believe the negative and lies if they want, that’s certainly a choice….. A dumb one, but still a choice.
You just keep going on fighting for the truth, and fighting for the freedom of survivors, and keep your light shining. For every naysayer, there are hundreds of us who know how much help you are and how you have always gone above and beyond to help people.
Thank you so much for all you do for the DID community, Kathy.
Thank you. I really appreciate all that you said…. thank you.