Zurcaroh’s Aerial Dance
When I first watched Zurcaroh’s Aerial Dance** — in the video embedded below — I was genuinely so overcome with deep emotion that I cried! For me, Zurcaroh was able to show a perfect picture of the spiritual battle fought by dissociative trauma survivors. This dance showed, for me, how good defeats evil.
I had to watch this dance a few times over — it was so incredibly powerful to me.
I knew I had to show this video to you. To give encouragement. To provide understanding. To share hope.
Hope is Real
In just two short minutes, I could see a clear picture of the fear, the trauma, the pain and devastation felt by innocent children who are surrounded by evil. To my relief, the roaring hunger of darkness was followed by an immediate appearance and connection to an even stronger power — the power of goodness, kindness, hope, and love.
This emotional, visual journey shows the story of a complicated, entangled abusive past, and yet, in one strong moment, it emphasizes the hope and truth that escape and freedom from those dark depths is truly possible.
This is the same hope that I want to share with you, and all DID survivors.
Please know, that hope is real. You do not have to stay trapped in darkness.
You too, can be safe, and free.
The Truth of What Happened
Zurcaroh’s artistry reminds me of the spiritual warfare and the horrendous personal battles DID survivors have had in their lives. This incredible dance performance shows the fight, the darkness, the pulls, the anguish, the conflict, the pain, the fear lived by trauma survivors. It’s overwhelming to see the vile clawing that happens at the young innocent children.
But I could see it.
I see the way young children are chased by predators, and how evil tries to devour the innocent little ones. I could see what it’s like when small children are so overpowered by the many predators of the world. The truth of this picture is devastating. It’s so heart-breaking to see.
I think of all the littles I know.
I think of all the DID kids I know, and even those I don’t know.
I think of all the young children who are forced to face such horrific demons of darkness.
At the same time, you can SEE the innocence of the children in this dance. They are in white. They don’t get darkness ON them. But oh my goodness…. they are tossed around, thrown around, clawed at, taken, hidden, grabbed … yikes!! We see quick glimpses of the children before they are tossed around all over again. And again. And again.
It’s a terrifying reminder of how young children have to fight such horrific battles.
But the story doesn’t stop there.
The Truth of who You Are
These beautiful children are not defeated.
They stay innocent, they stay pure. They fly above the darkness. They fought the fight, and they still remained true to light, love, goodness, and kindness, even though they were chased and hurt by an evil world.
Just like you.
Zurcaroh shows what I see in you — that love, light, and hope are not extinguished inside the many trauma survivors with whom I speak. How does anyone survive such evil horrors and not be utterly destroyed? How do these survivors stay such beautiful people with such gentle souls? It’s a spiritual miracle to me.
All the evil in the world doesn’t make everyone become evil. There are many of us who stay connected to the beauty of light and love, despite all the horrors that happen around us. Yep, that’s true! Maybe rare, but definitely true.
Surviving extreme trauma and sadistic abuse is a miracle in itself, requiring an incredible amount of personal strength, personal integrity, amazing creativity, and as far as I’m concerned, an undeniable spiritual soul, full of light, and an unquenchable ability to love.
They tried to claim you, to steal you, to keep you, but you are not one of them.
They tried to hold you down, but you can get free.
They tried to keep you there, but you can get away.
You have a soul and spirit that is connected to light and love — that is the truth of you.
So no. You don’t have to be part the darkness that surrounded you. You are the innocent child who flew above the darkness, held tightly, with strength and compassion, by an angel of light.
Good Defeats Evil
This is what I see — many may disagree — but I will hold on to this as truth.
Good defeats evil.
For you. For me.
For anyone who believes in light more than darkness.
For anyone who believes in love more than hatred.
We don’t have to be part of the darkness, even when it grabs at us.
I, too, choose to live my life on side with light and love.
Good defeats evil.
~ ~ ~ ~
For me, my interpretation of this aerial dance by Zurcaroh, is that there is a battle between good and evil, fighting over the children, of course. End the end, as you see in the picture below, the child is held and rescued by the light side, the goodness of the world.
I’m sure there are many interpretations of this art, as all Art is open to personal interpretation.
What do you see?
I love it when darkness is defeated.
That gives me so much hope, and so much peace.
May this be true for you too.
I’m very interested in hearing your thoughts, comments and reactions to this Zurcaroh dance.
When you watch the video, what did you see? What did you feel? Were you as emotionally impacted as me?
Does this dance touch your soul the way it touched mine?
Do you see yourself as victorious in the battle you have fought against evil?
I truly hope that you find comfort in this video, and that during any dark season, including these days around Halloween, that you remember the beautiful hope that Zurcaroh is showing you. Fly above the darkness that grabs at you, and hold tight to your angel of goodness and light. Know without a doubt, that you belong to love, not to hatred.
Don’t let the darkness steal you away… you don’t belong to them, no matter what they say.
I wish you all the light and love you need for your healing journey.
** PS: Sending out a genuine thank you to AGT — America’s Got Talent 2018 — and Zurcaroh for sharing such a powerful message with us. I think it’s absolutely incredible.
Copyright © 2008-2020 Kathy Broady MSW and Discussing Dissociation
Reading this article was really helpful to me.
We feel like we are in a spiritual battle currently.
As someone who has always had a strong faith (me, caroline) I find it… disconcerting to be engaged in what feels like warfare. I am trying to handle a lot of worry, unexpected anxiety and panic attacks, grief, and many moments of fear and hopelessness.
It helps me to remember that this is part of a fight between good and evil, and something that is really a lot bigger than me. I have to fight to keep the enemy from getting me down. I have to remember where my strength comes from.
I have to remember that while I feel like i am currently losing some battles, i know Who wins the war, I know that in the end things will all turn out ok. Even though i am currently bogged down in daily struggles, I have to keep my eye on the bigger picture. I am trying to teach the inside kids about keeping the idea of a bigger picture in their heads also.i get that they are five yea4s old, that theyre the center of their own universe, that they dont yet understand “big picture” things, but i will keep working on it.
Kathy the video dont be working anymore. It say it be marked private. we just wanted to let you know.
Kathy Broady MSW says
Thanks Wendy. I’ve replaced the link with a new video now — same dance, different link. This video shows several dances, but the aerial dance that appears first is that one I was referencing in this article.
Bethany Edwards says
I’m so glad I found this site! Lots of great information, thank you. You may be interested in reading my story, on http://www.healedandwhole.blog where I share my personal journey of healing from repressed childhood sexual abuse, ptsd, and DID.
Thank you for your honesty and bravery in sharing some of your journey on your blog, Bethany. It blessed me.
Bethel’s song, ‘No longer a slave’, is a song I listen to often as well. Particular worship songs are such an encouragement along the difficult journey which is DID.
I am learning the truth of the scripture which says ‘God is close to the brokenhearted.’ His presence is with me in a beautiful way. I couldn’t walk this road without my Shepherd by my side! He is in the overwhelm and the darkness, and he’s leading me through it.
And he is leading you too!
I will bookmark your blog and continue to read about your journey.
Ooooo Pearly! Have to say this to you….I hold onto God, too! It creates another whole “ball park” of processing that some (and sometimes even I) don’t understand….and I totally get that some people can get extremely triggered by anything about “God” because of their horrific experiences…
I have LOTS of questions – and things that I don’t understand – but still I somehow KNOW that I KNOW that He is there for me….and that He understands me – especially when I can’t even understand myself….and He doesn’t condemn me for it……
That’s so wonderful, MissyMing!
Yes, it so does create a whole new ‘ball game’ in all the processing! There is so much I don’t understand either, but He is with us, I have no doubt. We talk to Him about everything (no matter how shameful) and I know He is listening. I am learning more and more about Him through all this; He is an amazing heavenly Father who is demonstrating how much He cares, especially in the midst of all that we’re going through. I couldn’t do this without Him!
He is also proving to individual parts that He knows all about them and cares so deeply. He has provided for us in some precious ways. It encourages us to keep moving forward.
I also have found Scripture promises for each part which we hold onto when life feels overwhelming.
Blessings to you, MissyMing!
I let it in. It wins
Today November 1. Today’s I wake up in so much pain. Every inch of my body cries out from the toenail on my big toe, to the strands of hair. Just to touch my head with my hand create a sound wave of crying within. The body is stiff
Taken care of the grand babies will be challenging today, But also at the same time being therapeutic. A 1, 2, and 3 will give me lots to focus on. The downfall is al the pain that the physical body is remembering. It hurt so much to lift a 1 year old .
Sissy, I’m sorry you’re in so much physical (emotional?) pain. I can’t imagine what that feels like. Probably exhausting. I hope tomorrow is better for you/your insiders. Take lots of soothing time for yourself and hopefully it will dissipate soon.
Thank you. It has been a hard day. I have a few more days of internal torture. Then that pain will have Subsided. So will be able to rest for a bit.
I just wanted to send a note full of caring and support to you. Your various postings are so full of pain and longing but also wisdom and strength. You are courageous, perfect and strong just the way that you are. Just hold on to the understanding that you are not alone here. We are with you and want to hear and support you.
Take gentle care of yous!
thank you Kathy
that kindness means a lot.
I actually only read your last comment, and some of the article. couldn’t watch the video-don’t even know why. its halloween today and we are inside with doors and windows locked. reading more on this (amazing and awesome) blog tonight than every before. feels safe here. not really anywhere else. anything is making me jump and feel scared. not sure we even did have any ra or halloween specific abuse but wow we sure do and always have hated this day. scared all the way deep inside to a place that feels icy cold. not likely to get much sleep tonight as I can feel everyone on super high alert but I really hope to be wrong about that. . anyway. end babbling here. Lisa.
The motto for today
You’re braver than you believe
Stronger than you seem
And smarter than you think
10 31 18
I like this Jessie. Winnie the Pooh was very wise indeed. Thanks for sharing.
Right now, the real world is causing more stress and questions than anything else.
Kathy Broady MSW says
Hello to you all ….
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and opinions on this article. I have more to say to your individual responses… but for right now my thoughts are with so many folks out there in the world…..
Right now — at various times this week, at various this month — all over the globe — in country after country — there have been dissociative survivors fighting to survive a myriad of vicious crimes and horrific ceremonies. Please don’t think I’ve forgotten you. I haven’t. I know the battle still rages out there.
Even if you see this comment many days, weeks from now, the moment that I’m writing it …. please know that I am thinking of you, praying for your safety, and sending out gentle loving thoughts to ALL of you who need to feel gentle compassion and kindness.
So many folks are hurting this week.
I only wish I knew how to stop the abuse for everyone, and to somehow make life safe and okay and peaceful for each of you.
I would sit beside each and every one of you if I could….. yes, even YOU !
You are not forgotten, and yes, you matter.
Sending caring to you all,
I miss you hello hello that was fun you don’t do it anymore
This is my first post here.I had to thank you for sharing this video and your kind and caring thoughts
The video was thrilling and made my heart leap with happiness joy and made me want to fly! I love to dance and move. I felt part of the action rising above it all!! Thank you for acknowledging our spiritual battles. And recognizing our triumphs!
Wow. How do I put this into words. The emotions that I felt and still feeling.
This body has gone through so much.Nobody cared how old the birth Lori was.
All those demons in the darkness of night. So nobody could recognize them. All that evil overpowering there pray. Like a pack of wolves after a baby lamb.
It really shows. The lamb lost. It paid the ultimate sacrifice it died. So the pack can remain strong.
This is what happened to our birthday Lori. She is the lamb she died and we are her angels. We live for her.
We; the primaries, her angel. We have our own lambs. Waiting. Waiting ,for their angels to come help them. Save them from the darkness that was sentenced to them.
The kindness that been given to us come from angels around us. Such as but not limited to therapist friends and Acquaintances. It’s people that choose not to hurt us and any physical way. People that show respect for the human life and all other breathing things.
So someday maybe all those little sacrificed lambs can be unlocked and become sheep and be a part of the angels family.
WOW … lots of different reactions to this blog article. It sure has stirred up old stuff for some folks and a whole lot of interpretations of what was being portrayed here. Clearly there was a story telling of Adam and Eve and the devastation of evil that follows. I personally dislike the Adam and Eve story for the fact that it suggests that a woman was responsible for the downfall of man. I think that that plays into a justification for the abuse of women but that is a whole other posting.
What I would like to address here is the range of emotions that this performance has elicited. If you have been triggered by this video and/or what Kathy has written here, you have been given a great opportunity to find understanding in what it is that is triggering for you and why. Many of Kathy’s articles have triggering effect for me not because of what Kathy has said but because of the lens of abuse that I view it through.
I find that the more that I am triggered, the more that I have to learn. I would encourage those of you triggered by this blog article to try and reframe your thinking about it from chaos and catastrophe to one of opportunity. That is not to take away your pain and confusion. Rather, it is to try and help you see past the pain and confusion to understanding and, with understanding, healing. Kathy has offered MissyMing some great questions to ponder that I think that we can all use to help us here and in the triggering moments of our everyday life.
I also want to give my take on the video because I simply watched it as a wonderful piece of performance art. I also watched it through the beautiful framework of love, light and triumph that Kathy so eloquently wrote about in her introduction to the video. For me, the performance told the story of the submission to free will (the Adam and Eve refrain); to the abuse of free will to exact pain and suffering (the torment of the children to the forces of darkness); and the ultimate triumph of goodness to lift one out of darkness and into the light (the representation of spiritual self as the angel).
The telling of that story fits very well in with my own spiritual journey. Formalized religion is a part of my abuse history but that has not robbed me of my strong relationship with my spiritual self. Personally, I feel that my spiritual self was the genius behind the creation of my insiders and that my insiders are my super power portal to the Other World (however you define the divine). My meditation teacher keeps telling me that I am beautiful and perfect just the way that I am. The encouragement is to rest in that place of perfection if only for a moment. We are all pure, good and perfect.
Finally, Kathy titled this blog article – “The Spiritual Battle Fought and Won by Dissociative Trauma Survivors”. Somehow I am feeling that that message has gotten lost in the critique of the performance itself. I would encourage folks to forget about the video and just read Kathy’s words. We know that Kathy is safe and that the DD website is safe. That is why we come here and why we feel courageous enough to speak our minds and our truths. Let us not loose sight of the fact that this is our rock upon which we have found safe anchorage. What we talk about here may be triggering and difficult but it is done with compassionate understanding to help us on our healing journey.
Kathy speaks from her heart, honestly, openly and sincerely here at DD. That is why we value her and this space so much. Kathy also offers us an opportunity to see through the eyes of someone who has not been abused. I value her perspective because it helps me to see sometimes how skewed by abuse my vision can be. I know that Kathy has our best interests in her heart so I am particularly mindful to explore more deeply the legacy of my abuse when I am most challenged by what she has written.
Ultimately, I do believe that goodness prevails. It was the goodness in me that rose above the darkness of my childhood and ensured that I survived. My spiritual light shines even in my darkest hours. It is what sustains me, lifts me up and gives me hope.
Thanks for sharing. It emotionally impacted me for sure. The music was powerful and the dancers were so expressive. I’ve not seen a dance like that before. I wanted them to keep going. Very powerful.
I know it’s true that I belong to love and light more than hate and darkness. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that because the darkness seems so powerful and strong. The emotions seem to pull at us and cause us hopelessness. But we need to remember to STOP sometimes and remind ourselves that we aren’t hopeless. That there is always hope and light. The hard part is figuring out a way to remember this. But I will work at it.
We are not sure that “good” is more powerful than “evil”.
In other cultures, it is a balance, each playing a vital role in our lives. Neither one is better than the other.. They both merely exist.
It is difficult to see positive things for us. We are mostly pessimistic. It’s hard to think that “good” will win. We are in a fight for our lives right now. Each and every day Is a struggle to be alive. The body has serious health problems that are difficult to deal with.
We honestly don’t believe anyone “cares”.
So the dance we see coming has a different ending. The dark wins and death will surely come to us all.
Just remember that we live in the dark. We are the dark. Why are we deemed so bad? Why must light win? Why can’t the dark be just as beneficial as the light?
Why must we always be viewed as the people who others want to rid? Why do you hate us so
** trigger warning for RA trauma **
This is a sacrifice ceremony. I watched it with the sound off. At the end the circle of demons are stabbing her to death. She dies. Angel does not save her. Burst of light and fog, angel takes her soul. Only thing missing is the blood.
You are strong and safe and amazing. Hope you are feeling your superpowers. 🌈 10-29/18
Mean Man says
’m very interested in hearing your thoughts, comments and reactions to this Zurcaroh dance
When you watch the video, what did you see?
I saw how all the evil began with the eating of the forbidden fruit.
What did you feel?
It instantly remind me how we are all sinners. How it is okay to have are own believes and go against the grains of innocence. That’s it’s ok to go against purity. It is only in the eye of the believers.
Were you as emotionally impacted as me?
I too had to watch it a few times I kept asking why would you put this on here now. When so much happens for many of us this time of year. When we are fighting the demons that were place upon us. So I had to watch it until I felt I got the message. Until I saw what the message was. And not the message that was sent to me a long time ago. It took a bit for me to get over my body memories the memories I have in my head when I watched this. It took self talk. Also talking to you Kathy and my Belinda as if you both could here me. Then I got it. I got the message that help me realize that even though evil was done to this body and we can feel trap. We to can be saved and help with goodness
Does this dance touch your soul the way it touched mine?
Not a first I was bullshit. Bullshit that people would find it entertaining. Entertaining to watch those little girls get sucked into darkness to be clawed. For the powerful men to over take them. Then when I saw the same message that you saw I was a little a peace with it
Do you see yourself as victorious in the battle you have fought against evil?
Depending on the day . Some of us still get stuck in that dark place. We all don’t know each other yet. . I feel this biggest victory We have over the evil that We faced is We’re still alive.
maybe we are just too numb, but i was thinking we seen lots worse stuff than that.
maybe we are too hard hearted.
we dont be left pure.
and nobody gonna come save us like in that dance.
when the girl ws struggling to get out from under the group and got pulled back in to the group of bad men, we know how hopeless that feels.
we are not innocent. none of us anymore. we are not pure.
we were devoured long ago.
I’m suspicious of dichotomies in which white-appearing people are portrayed as good and dark skins are portrayed as bad. I had night trauma so I get darkness vs. light. I just think there are other ways to make that point without using skin tone in 2018. In his poetry, Rainer Maria Rilke depicts God as art who moves by hiding in shadows. Shadows derive from light. I find that more refreshing and soothing.
I found the dance theme more religious than spiritual: eating forbidden fruit leads to dangerous consequences and one who comes to save the fallen…Not meaning to disparage anyone who is religious. I find spirituality to mean something different for me.
Also not a big fan of rescuers (angelic or otherwise). I’m trying to get out of perpetrator-victim-rescuer thought triad myself. Of course for children in crisis now, we need adults to intervene. My childhood is over, though. So I need to survive and heal with the help of my challengers and coaches.
The dancing was very skillful. Didn’t like what I perceived as sexuality of Adam and Eve. Didn’t like the scary looking bad guys preying on a kid. Gross! Absolute disgust from me. The ending was not enough redemption for watching them suck that child back in. Ick. This was not for me. Hope I didn’t offend anyone with my critique. I was in a sour mood. 10/28/18
Oh my Kathy … the performance by Zurcaroh was breathtaking. Thank you for directing us to it. I watched it over and over again in amazement. It was indeed a remarkable message of the triumph of light over darkness. But, I must say that it was your words that really touched deeply into my heart and soul.
“… the innocence of the children … they don’t get darkness ON them … they fly above the darkness.”
“Surviving extreme trauma and sadistic abuse is a miracle in itself, requiring an incredible amount of personal strength, personal integrity, amazing creativity, and as far as I’m concerned, an undeniable spiritual soul, full of light, and an unquenchable ability to love.”
“Know without a doubt, that you belong to love, not to hatred.”
There is just so much power and love and light and hope in what you have written here. I am a great believer in the resilience of the human spirit, especially that of children, to find light in the darkest of life’s moments. As multiples, our insiders flew above the darkness and allowed the light of our brilliant, creative minds to guide us. We survived and in doing so we did not surrender to darkness and hatred. That may be hard for us to see at times but it is the eternal beat of our heart songs.
I know that there is light even in the darkest places of my broken self. As I hear and understand all of the dimensions of me, more and more pin-pricks of light fill the blackness of my life lost. It is an ever growing, ever glowing, ever glorious constellation of healing light. Only when we find the courage to look into the darkest will we start to see the light and know that we are not alone. And in the illumination of our truth, we find healing and hope.
Thank you Kathy for offering us yet another insightful and heartfelt article to fill our minds, hearts and souls with light.
Kathy….What is wrong with me? And my sister?….I couldn’t get anywhere’s near finish reading what you said about the clip in spite of how good it sounded and I could not watch the clip in your article…..I previously watched their clip from the Buzzer Worthy America’s Got Talent 2018 show….it terrified my twin sister and me…..the crosses and hoods terrified her and the members who were made to do the “cartwheel spin” terrified me…..the main man scared me and the very fact that the name of the group is a backwards spelling of his name was equally terrifying……also the segment of the double-jointed spinning performers in that dark house and the final look on that little girl’s face terrified us…I didn’t see it as “good” overcoming “evil”…..I saw it as her having a “hidden life” and belonging to “Them” now…….also the seemingly complete focus of the kids on him…..it felt like more than him just being their coach…….and we don’t know why it scares us so bad…….
I don’t know what this other clip looks like and am too terrified to even look…..did you see the Buzzer Worthy 2018 clip? Is it just us? Or do you see the terror of it as well? We have Internal waves of terror and wanting to fall to the floor and wail in despair….and we don’t know why?
I am not understanding how you could put a backwards-spelled name of a group on a site like this….I am sorry…..I am really confused and scared…….
Kathy Broady MSW says
Thank you for your comment — I knew there could be / would be lots of interpretations to this dance because, of course, all art is open to interpretation. You’ve brought up some important points, for sure.
And this is a perfect example of looking at a public situation, and seeing how difficult it is to know whether something was being done on purpose to send out a dark message, or whether you and your sister are feeling your own personal triggers being set off, due to your own histories of trauma. With the points you were mentioning, I can definitely hear how this group and their dances were triggering for you and your sister. There’s no doubt about that. More about that in a bit.
I did not know that the name of the dance group is a backwards spelling of the leader guy. I hadn’t caught what his name was in the first place, so… certainly didn’t know how to spell it backwards since I didn’t know how to spell it forwards, lol. I looked up the meaning of Zurcaroh, and here’s what Wikipedia said:
So…. yes, I can see that the name is a backwards version of the leader guy’s name, so I hear your point about that. Did they intend for the name to have a dark meaning in the way you are referring? I don’t know. Of course, there is the potential level of dark implication that you are mentioning — and there is also the possibility of choreographer who thought that was a creative way name their work after themselves without it being obvious to everyone. So was the naming done maliciously? I can’t know that at this point in time.
I have seen some of the other performances, and I didn’t like some of the others as much as this one. I didn’t like the dark feel of some of the other performances, or some of the costumes, so yes, I do hear your concern on that level, again. I haven’t watched them closely enough to really comment on those performances, or to say if they indicate a genuine connection to anything more than a creative dance routine.
Dance, and aerial movements require a lot of turning, spinning, jumping, etc. Again — is this an example of a creative body art performance and artistic movement? Or does it imply more? Because yes, of course, certain body movements, body positions, including “cartwheel spinning” can be used in traumatic situations, no doubt about that. I hear you, and I can see why certain movements could be a trigger for you.
What I can hear for sure, MissyMing, is that this dance crew is a trigger for you, and you are picking up elements that are strongly personal for you. Meaning… whether or not there is intentional triggering for anyone else, it would be an important way for you and your sister to address the issues you are both feeling when you see this group.
You don’t have to answer these questions on the blog, but I would encourage you to talk with your therapist about these things:
How does this dance crew relate to anything that you experienced in your past?
Were you ever forced / required to do “cartwheel spins” and if so, why, for what purpose, and what else was happening?
What does backwards spelling mean to you? What makes it feel so scary?
Were you ever involved in a group as a child where the children had to focus on the leader in more ways than being a coach?
Were you required to have a hidden life, especially as a child?
Who in your system has that terrified look on their face, and what are they scared of?
What do your insiders know about crosses and hoods, and why do they find those items scary?
What else can your system tell you about as they remember similar situations?
What do your insiders need from you in order to feel more safe, and less terrified?
Explore, explore, explore in your inside, MissyMing, and listen to your people. Really listen to them because I think they are saying things to you. And by using this dance as a catalyst, this creates a great big helpful opening for ways your system can answer your questions and tell you more about their experiences and your past. I remember that you are sometimes scared to hear from you insiders, but maybe if they can tell you more about why these dance performances are so upsetting for you, maybe you can pick up clues about your own traumatic experiences.
You can learn a lot from your inside if you follow up on some of these ideas…. I know that feels scary, but it can lead to deeper healing for you all.
I hope that’s helpful….
Please take kind gentle care of yourselves…..
I didn’t think you would put my comment on the blog…I don’t know what to think or feel. My sister and I talk a lot (even though we are on opposite sides of the country) – each
plowing through repercussions of panic and triggers in the present. Even though many of our fears and triggers are similar, we each have pieces of flashes we are afraid to say – because we are afraid we are making all this up….imagining things……
If I am saying “bad stuff” about “good” people – I am sorry……I just can’t tell who is “good” anymore……trust is hard……..
I have already had my T look at the previous clip I was referring to…..we are just in the beginning stages of considering “dark” stuff as I have been mostly plowing through triggers at work involving great difficulty in trusting and a great fear of being manipulated and used…..
Thank you for the list of questions to consider….I don’t know that I know how to even get there yet…maybe I AM making everything up and my perspective is all wrong….that something that was actually benign happened to us and our child-imagination just twisted it all around…..I wish I could cry….my sister can cry – a lot……I wish I could cry………
I couldn’t watch it. I had to turn it off.
As someone with Ritual Abuse experience, it was just way too much for me. Other people may have a different, more positive experience watching it.
And that’s OK.
It just wasn’t for me.
It didn’t get me till the little girl grasping trying to get out at the bottom of the pile of demons? Then being grabbed and sucked back in. Then The Archangel comes and saves them. That only resonated with us cos we have the same guy in our system who helped save one of our little’s the night she was created. But the rest was didn’t really affect us we were all too mesmerized by the coolness of the acrobatics 😂😂
Powerful beyond words. I was truly caught up in it, emotionally, physically. Thank you so much for sharing.
Us Plus says
The battle is SO real. At first I thought I would have to look away – the evil is so intense! I felt the pulling, the drawing, the tossing by the evil that doesn’t care about innocence, love or light. I panicked. I saw flashes of my life, my war, my silent hell. And then, just as I was about to run away, I won! I made it! I lived! I was lifted to the light by the light of love. I was safe! In the arms and of supernatural love! Oh my goodness! The battle was over! And I was tired, so tired. And I could rest safely for as long as I needed & wanted, bathed in love. The voices stopped. The evil was subdued & I was FREE! I cried, for the battle is real & the victory will be sweet.
Thank you for sharing Kathy. Thank you for dancing with us in the battle for light & life. Thank you for believing that Love conquers Evil.
Emotional dance. My systems response: we’re still waiting for the angel to rescue us. Very sad.
Hi Windsoar (love your name btw),
My personal spiritual belief system is that we are the light, we are our saving angel, we are pure and perfect and protected by our spiritual selves. I do not seek spiritual rescue or salvation outside of myself. I am God – God is me (I use the God word here for common understanding of the Universal spirit energy).
Okay, let me try to explain what I mean – we all have a spiritual essence. This is what gives us life. Actually, I believe that all living things have a spiritual essence in that we are all a part of the Universal spiritual energy. We are a part and connected. When we meditate (or pray or whatever) we tap into that greater spiritual energy. We become one with the Universal spiritual energy.
It is in that connection with the Universal spirit energy that we find our true Selves – the perfect, pure, loved Self that we were born to be – we were and always will be. That is the salvation for us – finding that place in the here and now where we feel the connection with our deep spiritual Self. That part of us was never taken away, never broken, never touched by trauma and abuse.
This is a long way around saying that we are the angels we seek, each one of us. We can rescue ourselves. We can find light and liberation in ourselves. We do not have to look elsewhere or wait to be rescued. We are the light.
Thanks. Our beliefs seem to be similar. However sometimes it is nice to think that there is some almighty being who will come save us from all the pain. The angel in the dance. Not my experience so not my belief. But perhaps still my fantasy. Thanks for responding. Blessed Be!