Wow — our first place to write anything has been a WONDERFUL success…. with well over 1,000 comments, and many ongoing conversations between dissociative survivors. Three cheers for Our Normal Complicated Selves!!
And like you, I was having trouble opening the page. I guess 1000+ comments on one page feels heavy to the internet ?? Not sure.
But even so — let’s just start a second page for ONCS here, and that will hopefully help.
Keep on writing !!
PLEASE POST BELOW
Use the Comments section of this article for DID survivor -to- DID survivor conversation.
I’m pretty sure that if you post, someone will write you back!
OH — and remember, when creating your comment, please use a generic “name”. You can use a system name, or a nickname, or a made-up name. You are not required and NOT encouraged to use your legal name.
Keep your privacy, and please do not post your actual name or location or contact information!
Thanks for staying safe, and happy chatting….
Warmly,
Kathy
Copyright © 2008-2021 Kathy Broady MSW and Discussing Dissociation
Sometimes I think “we” are making progress. Other times, I’m positive “we” are not making progress. Sometimes I think it would be better if “we” didn’t think about mpd/did , or work on getting better, and maybe even quit seeing our therapist of 30+years. Can’t we just forget it. Get out minds on something else. Forget all this stuff about being multiple! Wouldn’t that be great!!
And I feel the stomping and upset inside of the ones who feel unwanted, unloved, deserted with no one to care for them. Just like I felt when I felt abandoned over and over and over again. When I felt like a piece of trash that was being thrown in the trash can.
And I hear the words of my therapist in my head: “How do you think that makes them feel?” “No wonder they can’t trust you.”
1/28/23
Hello I’m slowly but steaddily navigating around the site,
It’s has given me so much reassurance in being able to heal and connect with my own parts.
I’m the most dossorganised person and while I’m super excited to astart working with my insiders, it’s rather difficult to stop reading all the articles, the way I cam relate to what I’m is just so uplifting to know there is an easy way to understand it and to offer a better way of describing things is the most valuable asset
Kathy and the whole team have made everything so much ore appealing g fore and I’m enjoying the ease of understanding more about our functioning. Thank you so much Kathy.
I so resonate to what you are saying Welshlady. For months and months my first insider to come out with my T would talk to her but not me. My T asked her to tell me what she was telling her. My insider would keep saying that she was trying to tell me but I was not listening. That frustrated the heck out of me. I would meditate for over an hour every morning trying to communicate with her and I would hear nothing. Then one day it dawned on me … she was telling me her story with body memories. I was listening with my ears and head and not my body.
Building communication with insiders can take so many different forms. There is no one route to this end. But, I truly believe that it starts with kindness, openness and a willingness to “hear” in whatever way that they are able to tell us. First, however, they have to want to tell us and I think that starts with trust and trust starts with consistency and honesty.
Just my take on it.
ME+WE
11-14-22
Just wondering which of Kathy’s articles people are finding helpful or if there is a topic anyone would like to chat about on here?
I am struggling with communication with any insiders (apart from adults as we are working well together) at the moment especially younger ones but can’t seem to work out why. They are very distant. Have decided to just ‘go with the flow’ but the unease is growing. So many responses inside…..go with the flow and stop worrying, have a break; they are being silenced you need to help them; they are all just imagination which is why they are disappearing; leave them stuck in the past where they belong and so it goes on. Then again all these responses are not wrong. They are all valid. Maybe I need to explore each of them ?
Welshlady
10/06/22
I sure wish I had some words of wisdom but I struggle with the same thing. I’ve been told to nurture my younger parts, but honestly half the time I forget they’re there. I know that sounds bad, but a therapist once told me I have a well-working DID system, so maybe that’s why I’m not always so aware. For that matter, I don’t even think of being a multiple a lot of the time. I’m not saying this is a healthy way to live, I just don’t know any alternative.
I would like to discuss this further if possible. I have a feeling if I put out consistent effort I’d be more advanced in knowing and understanding my littles.
We are struggling with the harsh reality of the truth of our life as well as facing the potential of leaving H. We left the forum a little while ago to focus on more body oriented therapies. We knew what this would mean. We knew we were becoming more aware of both the past and the present – unable to switch or dissociate like before, unable to ignore or dissociate from triggers. Own the many views, experiences , opinions, needs, wants yet we still physically hold feelings in, hide the inside world so ‘no one knows’. Keep the secret at all costs. It’s like parts have ‘grown’ into owning this body. Grown bigger and stronger. Pressure inside this body and mind is growing as this system desperately struggles to keep the inside world from connecting with the outside world. Keep the truth at a distance, outside of everyday life. At the same time communication inside has become disconnected, distant. As the front person for this system I actually feel very lost and alone. Therapy is not helping….we arrive with so much stirred up inside and overwhelmed …….and we leave the same. There is processing and understanding but also more and more connections, more being revealed. More becoming real. Never ending connections yet no communication between me as front person and insiders…..so it seemed. One way communication. But then it started to dawn on me that it’s not one way. I am communicating differently by focusing on this body. We may not be talking or writing but we are ‘remembering’. Together. I don’t understand it yet but somehow being more body aware is waking them up, bringing them alive. We are learning it’s ok to be in the same world as everyone else……and not be in danger. There is a strength in this body. Hardest part is that it’s also turning everyday life upside down. Becoming aware of the betrayal and emotionally abusive relationship we are in. Being present and aware is so much harder than I ever thought it would be but there’s no going back. No going back to denial. Disbelief is an escape at times but even that is fading away. It’s lonely. It’s big. It’s all consuming. No one to share this new awareness of the truth of our life with around us. That would be too much right now so it’s a lonely, sad, uncertain time where the only person holding the flag of hope is T.
Hello Welshlady,
I just saw your question asking me would I like to keep in touch. The answer is yes with a “Y”. And thank you for the invitation. I’m not always able to write as quickly as I would like to, and sometimes I don’t get another notification on my regular email .. it goes to the junk bin. But I’ve learned that I need to look there or else I miss notifications.
Thank you so much. I hope you’re having a semi – smooth day.
Sincerely,
My/selves+Me
10-05-22