Hello hello!
The other day I was digging around looking and looking and looking for that one thing that I put somewhere where I would never lose it.
And yes, of course, I simply could not remember where that particularly important never-to-be-forgotten filing place was, argh! 🙄
But there is a silver lining to this story. In searching and searching and searching, I found several other treasures I hadn’t seen in quite some time.
One re-discovered treasure was an article printed in “Many Voices” way back in April 1994.
This article, called “100 Strengths I Have” was submitted by Kimberly B. Kimberly’s article described a group exercise done by a group of dissociative survivors who attended a weekly out-patient group I had at that point in time.
We used an exercise described in the book Journal To the Self by Kathleen Adams, M.A. The goal of the exercise was to list out 100 positive qualities that each group member found in his or herself, or a positive quality they recognized in trauma survivors with Dissociative Identity Disorder.
Each group member was to come up with at least 10 positive traits — no editing allowed. As a group, we called out our positive ideas, one at a time. Any repeats were allowed. My thinking was that if the same positive trait was mentioned more than once, then it was a particularly strong strength, and in being so, it could have the extra recognition it deserved.
We wrote our list out as each answer was read out loud.
I liked seeing this list, and while some of you may have seen the 1994 Many Voices publication, there is a great big chance that most of you haven’t. I have decided to publish it here, and hopefully, it will be good for you to see as well.
What strengths do people with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID / MPD) have?
Let’s see if you agree!
What strengths do people with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID / MPD) have?
Here are the first 32 (column one), listed in the exact order and the exact wording that we spoke of them in our group that day, nearly 20 years ago.
1. An affinity for animals
2. A protectiveness of others
3. Broad life experiences
4. High tolerance for pain
5. More coping skills
6. Incredibly polite!
7. Willing to oblige other people
8. Investigative skills
9. Good bullshit indicators
10. Connecting skills
11. Able to handle pressure
12. Block out distracting or hard stuff
13. Many talents
14. Many interests
15. Lots of different clothes
16. Different hair do’s!
17. Different hair colors!
18. Different attitudes towards things, perspectives
19. Being able to figure out people easily
20. Self-adjusting and monitoring — no batteries required
21. Stamina
22. Learn not to care so much what other people think
23. Protective of others
24. Sympathetic
25. Empathetic
26. Lovable
27. Spiritual; sense of hope and faith
28. Realize life isn’t black and white
29. Ability to deeply feel
30. Ability to perceive more around us
31. Outsmarted our abusers
32. Don’t take things for granted
Isn’t that an excellent list?
This is only one-third of the list, the first column from the Many Voices publication, but it is a great great start. I will post this much to get it out there, and continue with the next 70 items in future posts.
AND, before the whole list is out there, I want to invite the readers of this blog to add your list of 10 positive qualities for being dissociative to this list, and I will post them along too, and the new and improved list of strengths.
If YOU have ideas to add to the list, please do write your thoughts out in the comments below, because it is true. You have strengths too. And your DID system will have strengths. I have no doubt about it!
There ARE good things about being dissociative.
There ARE good things about your life, about your, about your abilities, about yourself, about your talents, about your thoughts.
You DO have lots of positive qualities.
What positive qualities can YOU add to this exercise?
I’d like to hear your thoughts!
Warmly,
Kathy
Copyright © 2008-2018 Kathy Broady MSW and Discussing Dissociation
very interesting–I wonder if there’s ever been research on characteristics of people affected by dissociative disorders?
Here’s mine:
1. Great at reading facial expressions
2. Sensitive
3. Introspective
4. Very independent
5. Resilient
6. Detail oriented–notice things in the environment others don’t
7. Adapting
8. High emotional intelligence
9. creative
10. not superficial or materialistic
Thank you! Needed this today!
1. Persistent
2. Chameleon
3. Ambidextrous
4. Strong “perp radar”
5. Creative
6. Bookworm
7. Trust animals more than people
8. Not afraid to be alone
9. Slip in to various talents (selves) like clothes
10. Have extra senses, stronger senses.
It’s kind of a weird question Kathy. It’s a pathology, not a gift. But if you ask what good comes from suffering, I get that…So here are my top 10 from suffering:
1. You get to meet people who are amazingly empathetic and helpful and then find opportunities to do the same for others
2. You get to think about despair as a needed companion to hope,understand the relationship, and practice its lessons
3.You get to understand benevolence
4.You learn new ways to explain, articulate, or discuss your experiences
5.You’re able to introduce others to innovative ways of doing things or being with you
6.You learn how to interpret others’ coded phrases for help or pain
7.You get to practice forgiveness (i.e. systems, providers, family, friends) and gratitude (helpers, opportunities, life)
8.You get educational opportunities and new language skills (i.e. structural dissociation, explicit/implicit/autobiographical memory…)
9.You get to understand the width & depth of the experiences making your advocacy efforts for change more credible
10. You get to recognize that suffering, even when it makes no sense, matters. Your painful experiences may make you more sensitive and compassionate to someone else who believes they don’t matter.
It’s not a simple “listing” but nothing about me is 🙂
this is excellent! thank you for posting and thanks everyone who contributed in the article or comments
Reblogged this on Trauma and Dissociation and commented:
My 100 strengths by Dissociative Survivors -if you have Dissociative Identity Disorder check this out!
I have the ability to contain information much like a tape recorder. I can tell a person precisely what they said. It is often taken from others as a put down and it often gets me in trouble. It does benefit me when detail is important. ?
I see this ability in other DIDers as well. Ok you all… I think this is a great trait. Whether we remember something good or bad said.. It was said. Be that court reporter and dictate things others don’t remember at all!!!!!! Woo hoo!!!!
Good point, Jill. I’ve known several DIDers who also had this ability.
Amazing brains, that’s what I say. Truly amazing brains. 🙂
K.
We can look at any situation and see every possible outcome and every affected person’s point of view with ease.
We have unique takes on moral and ethical issues and can see both sides of those arguments
One person can learn a new skill and it can be filtered through so even a 3 yr old knows how to do it. (we’re currently learning to drive and our 3-5 yr olds are the best drivers :/ )
We are easily amused, fulfilled and grateful for the simplest of things, even if it’s just peace and quiet.
We are not generally very materialistic. And can bond easily with ‘things’ over people.
We are extremely creative and imaginative in every facet of our life not just arts and crafts/writing etc.
We are extremely practical and logical.
And that’s all i have for now. lol
Hey Weebs,
Oh that’s great! And those are some definite strengths, that’s for sure.
I like to see when dissociative folks can genuinely see and claim their own strengths. Albeit by necessity, there’s such a heavy focus on the terrible stuff — it’s like a breath of fresh air when someone can see the good stuff too.
Thanks for that!
Keep on rockin’!
Warmly,
Kathy
This blog slays! follows while taking notes
Benefits of DID:
never boring
adaptable
badass
protective of children
generous
survivor
intellectual
hardworking
Hi All,
Read this blog article with a smile on my face. I did not read the list of attributes that the group came up with or that others posted in the comments section. I thought that it would be more fun to just list out what I feel are ten positive traits of my self/DID folks and see where they fit with others. Hum … the 10th anniversary theme continues.
Here are my top 10 positive traits.
1. Resilience wrapped up in a fierce desire to survive.
2. A deeply held feeling of gratitude for life, a system of insiders who have protected me along the way and those who are supporting me now.
3. Compassion for other people without filters, exceptions or judgments.
4. Silly beans that keep me tickled inside, make me laugh, show me joy in life and give me my endless, crazy sense of humour.
5. Love of children and my ability to be completely with them as one of them.
6. A natural affinity for animals and the unspoken bond of unconditional love that we share.
7. Strength of mind, body and spirit.
8. Imagination that, amongst other things, allows me to travel out of my body and to experience other dimensions of the world and beyond.
9. My special portal to the Other World of spiritual awakening through my insiders and my ability to know what peace and stillness is like when the body surrenders to the flow of the spirit.
10. Creative intelligence to have come up with my insiders in the first place as well as to get to know, understand and work in cooperation with them.
I will be interested to read what others wish to share.
ME+WE
12/17/18
Positive results of suffering from and healing trauma combined with original abilities, in my case.
Almost never bored.
An unnatural ability to withstand social isolation.
An unnatural ability to withstand suffering.
A fast and tuned ability to identify invasive, predatory and parasitic people.
A sense of closeness to nature even when in a urban or artificial environment.
Lack of materialism combined with intensely valueing food and shelter.
An ability to understand and solve psychological problems, identifying the source of psychic phenomena, and creating solutions ad hoc.
An ability to understand and profile deep and anomalous criminality in the world.
An elevated ability to sense people, places, and things.
CODA : A deep understanding that prevention is greater than cure.