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You are here: Home / Compulsive Hoarding / Land of the Free?

Land of the Free?

By Kathy Broady MSW 9 Comments

For folks in the USA, it’s the July 4th holiday weekend.  Barbecues, picnics, swimming parties, and fireworks are happening all over the country.  Red, white, and blue stars and stripes are visible in every direction.  It’s a fun holiday – most people are in festive moods.

 

July 4th – Independence Day

 

The point of the Independence Day holiday is to celebrate freedom. 

It’s about being free, living in a land that is free, feeling free and all kinds of good stuff like that.  Freedoms do exist in all kinds of ways – there’s no doubt about that.  Life can be good.  Most of us here in America have the freedom to live our lives in ways that we choose for ourselves.

But is everyone free?

Unfortunately, no.

People get trapped and stuck in a variety of ways.  When this happens, their life feels anything but free.  Sometimes the traps are made by the people themselves.  Sometimes traps are made by societal views, racial hatred, poverty, language barriers, etc. Sometimes the traps are made by mental illness.  Sometimes traps are set by other people, especially in situations involving chronic trauma and abuse.  Sometimes traps are made with mind control.

This weekend, while I am enjoying the chance to make decisions for myself, I am thinking about people who are not feeling as free as I am.

 

1. Trapped within their Compulsive Hoarding

Have you seen any of the recent flurry of television shows about compulsive hoarding?  Titles such as “Hoarding: Buried Alive” (shown on the TLC channel) describe exactly how trapped people become when they suffer from compulsive hoarding. 

Their own home becomes their jail, and far too many compulsive hoarders are stuck in their lifestyle, with no clue how to free themselves from such heaviness.

Hoarding: Buried Alive by TLC

Hoarders do not feel free. 

They do not have a sense of freedom in their own homes.  They are often laden down with many extreme obsessions, compulsions, anxieties that may not even be rational, but still claim total ownership to their mind and lives.

The more someone hoards, the less space they have to move.  Eventually, even the freedom to walk around their own home becomes nonexistent.  They become complete prisoners to the items they are hoarding.

 

2. Trapped with Fears and Phobias

Fears and phobias can imprison a person in a very extreme way. 

Fears of talking to people, fears of leaving the house, fears of trying new foods, fears of eating in public, fears of riding in cars, fears of the unknown, etc. can all keep a person stuck into a very limited life-space. 

When people are too frightened to venture out of their status quo, they are stuck and trapped in whatever place they are in.  The more fears they have, the more traps they live in.  Their living space can get smaller, and smaller, and smaller.

 

3. Trapped by Obesity and Eating Disorders

Categories of Weight

People that are obese are trapped within their own bodies. 

The lack of freedom to move, or walk, or bend, or stretch can feel very entrapping. 

Eating disorders, including anorexia and bulemia, can also create a prison with the body.  When the body becomes the prison, every minute of the day feels trapped.  There is no freedom since the prison goes everywhere.

 

4. Trapped with Ongoing Abuse and Trauma

Unfortunately, there are far too many survivors of trauma and abuse that are still current victims of trauma and abuse. 

Ongoing violence and abuse

This includes anything from child abuse, domestic violence, incest, and date rape, to human trafficking, prostitution, sex slavery, cult groups, etc. 

When people are controlled by other people through violence and pain, they are often too beaten down to see a way out.  They are not allowed to see or believe that they can escape from their abuse, and they are typically not given or allowed the resources to leave. 

Any efforts to leave require an incredible depth of personal strength since the external controls and risks of violence are excessive.

 

5.  Trapped with Mind Control

Mind control is the invisible jail. 

Dissociative survivors of chronic, severe abuse have elements of mind control that effect every essence of their lives.  Survivors of organized or ritual abuse will absolutely have parts within their internal dissociative systems that were purposefully made and created in order to contain elements of mind control and programming. 

DID survivors with mind control issues will have parts in their systems that have been expertly trained to do tasks that are opposite from what the host personality / day parts are willing to do. 

Amnesia and dissociative walls (blocking off the sharing of information) can mean that a dissociative survivor can have missing time and minimal (if any) awareness that certain events happened.  DID survivors may have no awareness of what is going on in their own lives.

Who is in control of the mind and body?

Mind control can dictate what dissociative survivors say, where they go, who they talk with, who they interact with, what they do, what they tolerate, what they feel, what they think, etc. 

Having internal system parts that are controlled by mind control means that there are certain elements of the life (and certain times of the day or night) that your life is being completely controlled and manipulated by someone else. 

Other parts of your system will take over the body and they do exactly what they have been told to do by the abusers who are using the mind control tactics.  This can be very scary, and the people whose lives are “taken over” by mind control certainly do not feel free.

 

Creating Freedom within Your Own Life

When you are trapped by any of the above-mentioned areas of life, it will take a lot of hard work to get out of those traps.  It is possible.  Yes, in every single situation mentioned above it is absolutely possible for the enslaved people to get out of all the traps.  But freedom for any of these people does not come easy.  It takes a lot of consistent work, typically for years of time.

  • Do you want real freedom in your life?
  • Do you want the ability to walk, move, think, decide, and believe for yourself?
  • Do you want the freedom to be your real, authentic self and have a life completely under your own control?

 

Freedom is to be your true self is an absolutely wonderful thing.

And yes, that’s an option for you too.

Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

You might have to fight for it, but yes, absolutely, you can have freedom too.

 

Warmly,

Kathy

 

 

Enjoy some fireworks!

 

 

Copyright © 2008-2020 Kathy Broady MSW and Discussing Dissociation

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Filed Under: Compulsive Hoarding, Depression, DID Education, DID/MPD, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Domestic Violence, emotional pain, mental health, Physical Abuse, Ritual Abuse, Therapy and Counseling, Trauma, trauma therapist Tagged With: Anorexia, Anxiety, BMI Scale, Bulemia, Categories of Weight, Child Abuse, Compulsive Hoarding, Creating Freedom, Date Rape, Depression, DID / MPD, DID Survivor, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Domestic Violence, DV, Eating Disorders, emotional pain, Family Violence, Fear of People, Fear of public places, Fears, Feeling Trapped, Freedom, Healing, Hiding in the corner, Hoarders, Hoarding: Buried Alive, Human Trafficking, Incest, Independence Day, Independent Thinking, Invisible Jail, July 4th, Kathy Broady, MC, Mind Control, Obese, Obesity, Obesity Table, Obsessions, OCD, Ongoing Abuse, Organized Abuse, Prostitution, RA, Risks of Violence, Ritual Abuse, Sex Slavery, Therapy Process, TLC, Trapped, Trauma, Trauma Survivor, trauma therapist

Comments

  1. sallysmith86 says

    July 4, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    We want it so bad! Thank for this today 🙂 4th of July has always been extremely difficult for me. Because up until recently I never thought I even had a -chance- to be free. I always felt “trapped inside my head” – Not to mention the fireworks are triggers as well. But We CAN get free!! 🙂 — And If you think about it once you believe that it’s possible and believe that you can and will get there – you’re already a little more free than you were before. 😀
    Thank you so much Kathy!!! 😀
    Sally

    Reply
    • Kathy Broady says

      July 4, 2010 at 10:40 pm

      You’re very welcome, Sally. And yes, believing that freedom is possible is half the battle. But now that you know it’s there, go for it! It belongs to you too! 🙂
      Good luck!
      Kathy

      Reply
  2. identity4 says

    July 6, 2010 at 8:01 am

    When I started reading your post I thought “is it possible for us to be free from all this. Can we really survive and overcome mind control. Can we have a life of freedom?
    Thank you believing.. in freedom.. in a life of worth..
    thank you for giving us hope…

    Reply
  3. kiyacat says

    July 12, 2010 at 12:17 pm

    this was hard. couldn’t really respond. also had to get the passy to get back in and that was just too much. we’re kinda free now… we got out of the house and into our own place. but mom is sick now so it’s been such a struggle to stay free. this was right over the 4th and was just too close to surface. mom wants us with her allllllllllllllll the time. she has penumonia and had some heart problems. she was in the hosp that whole week. she thinks it is hard on us because we (or i in her mind) stay awake worrying about her, >_< we stay awake worrying we're gonna get sucekd back in.
    the bigs have been going good with making boundaries and we've got group therapy intensive – reg. t. been out of town, of course. things always happen when she goes away…. she's gone next week too and so is group t. so things are strange right now, but we're still in our place and still putting boundaries and the mom finally went to stay with the bf and finally told him we moved out. *whew*.

    Reply
  4. Becca Boo says

    January 11, 2012 at 11:09 pm

    I’ve been with a DID specialist for almost 5 years now, and just have come to realize there is still ongoing abuse outside of my awareness (I’m sure my therapist was always aware), and a ton of mind control/reporting back, etc. I can’t find information anywhere on reporting back to abusers online, do you address that anywhere on here? Is there truly hope? I’m 27 and beginning to think there is something genuinely wrong with me that my father is still able to essentially own me at this age. Thank you for your time…

    Reply
  5. bunchesoffamily says

    May 9, 2012 at 3:44 pm

    Becca Boo, I just read your comment and I wanted to tell you I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. We just realized that we were still being abused quite recently and don’t know what else we will learn and that’s been hard. So I can kind of relate. And no, it’s not that somethings wrong with you. Somethings wrong with him for treating you that way. It’s totally wrong of him. I found one article on safety for ritual abuse survivors and on protecting yourself from reporting back. I don’t know if this will be helpful or if it applies to your situation, but I’ll put the link here http://endritualabuse.org/activism/safety-tips-for-ritual-abuse-survivors/
    I really hope you can find the safety that you need and please don’t think it is your fault that he is treating you this way.

    Safe hugs if you want them,
    bunchesoffamily

    Reply
  6. kiyacat says

    October 26, 2013 at 11:00 pm

    But how do we get free of the mind control? It went very very badly yesterday when T tried to connect with that… Entity. Very badly. And now both T and us are really skart! Catch 22. She can’t connect with HIM and we can’t move forward without something forward moving here. But we get punished if HE is activated. Then at got upset cuz she activated HIM that caused us harm. @_@
    Skart!

    Reply
  7. rylie says

    July 3, 2018 at 11:58 am

    we be trying hard to get free. there be so many things to get free from. maybe a million. it feels like its taking forever.
    i dont know if we ever will get free from everything.
    this week be 4th of july but around our house holidays dont be anything special.
    the only thing we be doing is going to fireworks on wednesday night.
    we dont have family to do picnics or special things with.
    its just a reguler day.
    we wish we had fun things to do.
    but at least we get to go to fireworks.

    Reply

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Kathy - a clinical Social Worker, surrounded by kelpies, who enjoys puzzles, pianos, pizza, pretties in nature, and people with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

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