I’ve been thinking for hours now about what kind of profound post I would make at the beginning of this new year. Or this new month. Or this new day. My words are still trickling in slowly….
So, while I’m thinking, I’ve decided to ask you all what you are thinking….
What are your goals this year? this month? this week?
And, seriously, if you could rule the world, what would you do? What changes would you make, and how would you bring those about? How would you address the world economy? How would you approach world peace? What would you do about famine, wars and diseases?
Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to fix such big problems with just the snap of your fingers.?!
Okay, okay, so all that is just a little too unrealistic.
It doesn’t hurt to dream, but let’s talk about the worlds you can control – you own life, your own system, your own internal worlds.
At this stage in your life, you do have a lot of input into what happens in your life. You aren’t a helpless, child without resources or power. You are grown. You are much older, and while you might be stuck and struggling at certain points, you truly do have considerably more freedom, more power, more options, more control than you had in your early years of life. You can’t change the past, but you can make it so the past does not cripple your present so much. You can make this year, these days, even right now, better for yourself.
I’m just sure you can.
It’s not necessarily easy and it might take a whole lot of hard work, but you do have the ability to make things better for yourself.
So let me ask again.
What are your personal goals for this year?
What are your hopes? your dreams?
What could realistically happen for you this year if you really worked for it?
What areas of your life do you want to heal?
What do you want to happen within your own system?
How are you going to help your internal parts this year?
Who do you want to meet from within?
Who do you want to establish a friendly, working relationship with from within your system?
Who do you want to connect with in the external world? Even if that means mending some fences, and working through conflict issues?
With whom do you want to create stronger boundaries, so you aren’t as vulnerable or as abused by them?
What topics are going to be the focus of your therapy?
What areas of your life are you willing to leave on hold for now?
We are each in charge of our own lives.
Some say that to a very large degree we actually create our own lives. I understand that some things happen outside of our immediate control. However, we can decide to work around and grow past those obstacles, no matter how big they are. As much as we have to work with the cards that we have been dealt, we also can make decisions in the current day to make our lives more how we want them to be.
What do you want for yourself this year? How hard are you willing to work – learn – research – stretch – push yourself to get that?
If getting something new and better in your life means letting go of something familiar but “crappy”, are you willing to do that? Are you willing to prevent or refuse to allow victimized thinking that keeps you stuck in places you don’t like? Are you able to find your own way, your own strengths, your own power, your own ability to think?
Do you believe in yourself and your self worth enough to get something better?
It’s a New Year.
What’s going to be new about your year this year?
Copyright © 2008-2018 Kathy Broady MSW and Discussing Dissociation